Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
So ran into your ex from sophomore year last night... Apparently hes gay and a stripper now. we all got lap dances because we knew you
You won't wear your Santa suit, I can't get trashed, and you won't use handcuffs! This is the worst Christmas EVER.
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
I thought I needed to get laid. Turns out I just needed pasta.
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
Fuck this pandemic. She grabbed the hand sanitizer instead of the hand lotion while giving me a hand job and now my dick is burning and scrotum are on fire
A hand job? Are you 12?
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