The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
What are you doing tonight?
Watching dora the explorer and pining for a sex life.
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
Just so you're aware, tomorrow is "Slow Clap when you see Mike" day.
I think the tooth fairy visited me last night... after I chipped my tooth n blacked out, I woke up to my purse filled with cocaine n sequins.
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
He appeared on my 7th floor fire escape and sang to me and jimmy through the window when we fucked. He's like a drunken mix of Sinatra and Spiderman.
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
Randomize
