Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
SOOOOOO I just attempted to go to the gym, hungover. Ended up throwing up in the bathroom. I hope people think I'm just working out really hard
Is 10AM too early for pizza and Dr. Pepper?
Only if 5PM is too early to be drunk. And when has that ever stopped us?
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
Randomize