You dirty dirty liar I like the way you twitter
I successfully cooked a taquito with a lighter! My stomach hurts now tho.. im either guna blame it on the undercooked taquito or im feeling guily about porkin my brothers gf a lil bit ago
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
a girl just told me i should have been born earlier in the alphabet
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
Hungover like ... in bed with the Brita pitcher and a straw, only opening one eye at a time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm very fluent in vodka, but that seems to be a whiskey dialect.
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
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