Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
Highlight of my weekend: having my card suspended due to "suspicious charges" and standing in line at the gas station yelling at customer service on the phone that I really did go to 4 different strip clubs in one night
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
Confession: Sometimes I wear my stolen scrubs to the corner store because people will think I'm a doctor and not just a girl too lazy to change out of her pajamas.
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
Can you repeat that, but with context?
did i just pee glitter
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
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