Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
i woke up with toilet paper straight tucked up in my underwear wearing a pizza sauce mustach. I dont think i got laid last night.
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
First date. He's wearing a tuxedo shirt and keeps asking me about our future children. Escape plan #3 is now in action...
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
So my dad just asked, "did you leave without pants a lil bit ago?"
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
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