We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
In all honesty of all my sexual conquests, his dick is probably my proudest moment.
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
last nights episode of shot friends brought to you by polish vodka and flamingo baseball. pickles cure hangovers.
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
Randomize
