Not that I thought your boyfriend was a phile
But the whole crossing guard thing? Weird.
We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
OMGGG I JUST SAW A REAL OWL JUST CHILLING ON TOP OF A SIGN POST. I WALKED UP TO HIM AND SAID HOO HOOOOO AND HE TURNED HIS HEAD AT ME AND WAS LIKE YEAHHH BRO
I remember saying to him "Fun fact! If you lie this way it's easier to deep throat!" I even judge me.
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
We kicked down a door together last night, pretty sure that qualifies us as best friends.
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Randomize
