The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
I have 7 papers to write and I already bought gas station ice cream in my pjs and questioned whether or not a beer float was a thing.
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
Momentum is force x velocity. So therefore velocity is 0 - hammered, and force is ur legs locked up and ur face hits the ground.
I felt paralized they just wouldnt move. We need segways when were drunk cuz if we start to fall forward they well take off and save the fall.
She sent me nudes via email. What the fuck are we still in the 90s? Grow up
Everyone should just give me a copy of their keys. I take your dog out and I bring beer.
Something like, "Merry Christmas. I hope Santa shits in your mouth."?
Randomize
