one might say we're banned from that church
We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
I just saw the Donald Trump of homeless quys walking down the street. He had three shopping carts and a bike.
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
I woke up this morning with a wristband and I thought I went to the hospital last night I actually went ice skating instead
He was all like, "I think ur the one that got away and I miss you." I replied, "I gave u a hand job once in your hot tub. No need to wax nostalgic about it."
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
I'm definitely going to class still drunk right now and the freshman dressed as Hugh Heffner last night is texting me. I can't handle this.
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
Imma need a double jack on the rocks and a BJowsky from the hot bartender.
Yes I said BJOWSKY. Pronounced "buh jow skii".
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
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