In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
just found my calculator watch from 6th grade. the hipster transformation is complete
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
Yeah I had to push her down the hallway to the hotel room in a luggage carrier. The guy at the desk told me goodluck
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
I told a 250 pound football player I would catch him if he jumped into my arms. And that is how I broke my wrist
If you got me high enough to laugh at a ceiling fan until I shat my pants you should at least have the decency to buy me another pair
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
The guy like flippppped out and made me pay $15 for a car wash. I thought I was being extremely courteous by making sure to puke outside the window
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