He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean honestly, I love naps like Anthony Weiner loves sending dick pics
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
We are totally like Jim and Pam, except ya know, drunk and not together anymore.
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