At least make sure they are 18
Why
At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
I need a secretary to manage my drinking schedule.
We had a race to see who could chug their vodka tonic faster. College doesn't seem to be working for me... I'm getting exponentially dumber
I want an alcoholic time machine so we could skip to new years eve
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
You claimed your dick was a divining rod, spun in a circle 3 times and walked into the bar you stopped in front of...consequently there was a bikini shoot going on
Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards.
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
You added his wife on Facebook?! You're horrible at this mistress thing
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