Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
That dude you fucked three years ago just won Jeopardy
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
Did you really lure me out of the bar with a blond holding a dunkin donuts bag? Well played sir, well played.
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
My new roommate is awesome. His father owns a bar and his sister has an E cup. I'm going to be with him forever
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
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