I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
I am going to paint butt plugs like little Christmas trees and give them as gifts.
You could paint cock rings as wreaths.
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
Randomize
