I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
I just tried to pick my 105-lb puppy up and accidentally fingered its asshole
There are some things we keep to ourselves Brian
everyone is single if you try hard enough
One little Beyonce reference and he turns on me faster than liberals on Jon Mackey
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
I still think it's messed up that you're naming your kids after all the guys you slept with in college
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
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