I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
In case I die. I'm in ares truck with a bartender named Dave from chuys. JUST IN CASE. And let the people know my last words were suck my dick. My like literally.
why did i wake up in the bathroom?
we had to stay with you a while until we convinced you it wasn't safe to wash your face, then you fell asleep with your foot in the toilet.
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
Stop trying to get me to choose vodka over a nap
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
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