ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
I feel like the only phrases I can clearly speak while drunk consist of: i'm fucking drunk, chug, and shots
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
There was an unopened condom by my car when I went to pick it up this morning. Someone may have fucked on the hood of my car last night. Don't think it was me but I can't rule it out 100%.
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
After you passed out we took your car to the campus and stole a 150lb plaque that's now in your trunk. Happy birthday!
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
Don’t drink the Bloody Mary - it’s vodka and salsa.
Randomize
