brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
I just changed her number in my phone to "You Wouldn't If You were Sober"
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
I sent him a bunch of texts telling him that his beard wasn't long enough yet so we couldn't fuck and to text me back in a few hours if it had.
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
I had one beer! ONE BEER! They took shots in mourning of my tolerance last night. My ability to drink is a joke.
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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