A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
In all fairness I did warn the guy I just spray tanned before we had sex so I hold no responsibility for the bronzer all over his sheets
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
literally just blacked in. Im watching what to expect when your expecting, eating pretzels and peanut butter, and I have someone's underwear around my neck.
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
Randomize
