I just walked into the kitchen and my dad was having this uber serious convo
With himself
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
I am going to wait until he wakes up to set his couch on fire and then pee it out. That way he knows it was not an accident.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it weird to say that getting an std with you was kinda romantic?
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
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