So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
the next pure michigan commercial i see, i am going to pee in a fucking lake
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
Ended up passed out drunk in the neighbors lawn, still in costume. Neighbors thought I was a lawn decoration. Ten points for best Halloween ever.
Last night she showed me how to clean my bowl and now she's drunk making peanut butter filled cookies. Best. Roommate. Ever.
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
... Already stepped in vomit and got a dirty look from a fat in a neck brace
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
Fair warning birthday party last night avoid kitchen & upstairs bathroom if you value your remaining sanity
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
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