so i told her that taking semen on the face helps make your skin smoother.
and?
luckily she was drunk enough to believe she had really bad acne...
He looked me in the chest and said "I think I was visited by the titty fairy last night"
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
not sure when or how we ended up at this wedding party but you need to be here they are handing out screwdrivers and Yamakas to everyone and it's a got damn open bar you need to be here now
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
Another thing to add to the list of things not to do while I'm drunk......explain to the upstairs neighborr how to have quiet orgasams......she now thinks I want to be part of a threesome......fuck my life
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
Randomize
