No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
i don't plan on having that self control this summer
Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
Man. Apparently I blacked out between the 4th margarita and my air mattress. Asleep in my jeans at 10pm. Mom outdrank me again.
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
i don't think the phrases "so shitty" & "taking care of my newborn" should be combined in the same sentence. leave it to her to make it possible eh?
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