Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
maybe i'll make good life choices and keep my legs closed. periodically txt me friday and saturday night saying "baby carrot round 2" that should stop me.
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
I'm not sure any amount of coworker judgement will keep me from eating oatmeal with dinosaur eggs.
Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
I woke up to a shattered My Little Pony garbage pail, a black eye I don't know how I got and no one will look me in the face. Fuck tequila.
Shaving your bikini line at 11 at night in the Walmart bathroom feels trashy no matter why you're doing it.
And the view of you in reverse cowgirl is arguably the most spectacular view ever... And I've seen the Eiffle tower, the colosseum, mountains of Hawaii, Michaelangelo's David, and the Mona Goddamn Lisa. Just saying.
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
I'm gonna snort this pill I found on the ground cause that's how classy I am. Watch football and eat Beef jerky. Domesticated at its finest.
there is a smiley face on my leg painted in blood
I'm pretty sure that's yours.
I am never drinking with the goths again.
Randomize
