Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
I woke up in a hospital at three in the morning only to realize my pee is now going to be orange. I've grown to realize I've made all the right decisions
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
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