i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
We had sex this morning and after she goes, " So are we going to do something for Valentines Day?"
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
I want an alcoholic time machine so we could skip to new years eve
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
Apparently I blacked out and started wrestling with some dude last night. Just found out I might have dislocated his shoulder. Best part: he still wants to bone me
I woke up with broken tostitos all over my bed and a snap chat of myself flipping off the camera.
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
Randomize