Dont touch anything! You just got rid of your crabs!
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
Ever since they found the bud they've been sending me visa gift cards instead of cash. Bastards.
My boss just gave me full permission to come into work wasted this weekend.
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
You stole a frozen pizza from the freezer, stuffed it in the back of your shirt then proceeded to leave the party.
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
I will always make you feel special and slightly offended. That's my job.
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
Randomize
