Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
i don't know whats more disturbing, that his dog drooled directly into my mouth or that i was too drunk and tired to do anything except let it be there.
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
How is it that lesbians won't hit on me at a gay club, but they'll hit on me every time I go to Walmart?
I'm drinkin whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
My cleaning lady broke my bubbler. It's awkward between us now.
Why?
Because she knows I do drugs and I know she's a clumsy bitch.
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
You're not gonna like every guy whose dick I put in my mouth
One lone grasshopper in the whataburger bathroom. Don't know how it got there. Scared the fuck out of me. Also puked over the side of the silverado fence. The horses looked disappointed. Animal magnetism is beautiful. You taught me well. I love you.
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