dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
We both paused during sex to do the clap during the Friends theme song. Soulmates.
Yeah everyone's alive and well besides the still terrifying threat of Ted's conception of a human being
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
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