Mmmm, vodka for breakfast
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
I may have pooped in your shoe. or somewhere else in your closet. its unclear.
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
How many more of your relationships do I have to destroy before you realize sleeping with me isn't a good idea?
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
There was already gay porn open on my laptop with a tiny carrot cake, a bottle of water, and a note saying "I love you, Sober Me."
Drunk me just hits it and quits it.
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