we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
i feel so shallow. people in iran are using twitter to write hardcore nathan hale shit about dying for freedom. my last tweet was "i hate the taco shits"
she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
I told him he deserved someone better...then I told him he looked very fuck-able wearing nothing but sweat pants. We'll break up in the morning.
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
Who else will cuddle and watch the Bachelor with me then finger bang me during the rose ceremony
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
Randomize
