So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
he just tried to convince me that tylenol is a gateway drug
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I imagine my 13 hours of sleep after my 3 day upper bender was similar to Jesus rising from the dead.
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
So the TSA can feel me inside and out in front of 40 people, but they catch me fucking in the bathroom 20 feet away and all of a sudden their the decency police
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
I'M IN A SPINNING VORTEX OF SELF-HATRED AND HORNINESS
Complete and utter failure. 100% unsalvageable. I have not failed so hard at a culinary endeavor in YEARS. MY HONOR IS IMPUGNED I HAVE SHAMED MY HOUSE
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