He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
Bro, I just want to tell you that I'm glad you got fired. I'm going to fuck your replacement.
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
How did a couple beers and monopoly turn into a bottle of vodka and throwing eggs at eachother in the kitchen?
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
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