There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
I am spending my child support on dildos
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
Putting a breathalyzer in a bar is a horrible idea. But I won
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
Come over. I have beer, your weird ass vegan pizza, and a raging hard on.
Marry me.
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
I opened the door, threw up on the street, wiped my mouth and flashed a thumbs up to all of the cars behind us and kept on driving
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
Randomize
