to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
Some kid just stopped wherever he was walking, turned to me, and gave me a slow clap. So I'm pretty sure my walk of shame beats yours.
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
Randomize
