Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
We were hooking up, both of us naked. She starts putting her clothes back on and says, "I have to go to the bathroom." I reply, "No you don't, you're leaving." Without hesitation she looks at me and says, "Yeah."
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
Hey please buy toilet paper today. Plastic grocery bags are starting to hurt now
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
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