also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
I wish I had a dollar for every time I've slept off a late night I dont want to remember in my recliner.
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
I was holding her hair back and when she quit puking she told me she's been saving her scissor virginity for me.
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
My car windows are covered in lube. Happy 4th of July!
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
Randomize