just got pizza delivered to the hot tub. its easier than i thought to be this lazy
I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I forgot it was 4/20. that COMPLETELY explains the 7/11. i was like "that's a lot of white dudes... and they're really into snacking."
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
No more morning sex. Just for once, my vagina would like to go to work bone-dry and bone-free.
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
Relax
It's hard to relax when a woman is waxing your asshole.
Randomize