I can't watch pbs sober anymore
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
Are you really surprised she can't remember? That's like 50 people. I couldn't rattle off all 50 state capitols off the top of my head, you're bound to forget a few here and there
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
Shelly has the weirdest luck. Dude offered her a job riding a bucking bronco and it was not porn or stripping but an actual g-d cow.
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
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