Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
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