What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
Just watched a guy get through airport security with a full bottle of captain morgan. In my head the entire airport cheered.
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
Randomize
