did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
My girlfriend and my fuck buddy both started their periods this weekend. The good news is, neither of them are pregnant. The bad news is, I'll have to find someone else to fuck til next weekend. No wait.....that's good news too.
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
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And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
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In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
He sends me the same inspirational quote quotos that my grandma does. I no longer want to tap that.
How long do I have to listen to him talk about the chickens before telling him I just really want to fuck? Note: it's already been twelve minutes.
Fuck. I think I can already feel tomorrow's hangover. It's like future me cane back to warn present me about the impending doom but didn't turn the time dial back far enough.
Randomize