I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
Dude, I passed out on the side walk, lost my phone and shirt, and walked 12 miles home after I disappeared from the club
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
I swear to god if you keep eating my cats food drunk I am going to kick you out of our apartment.
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
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