How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
I don't think tequila will soothe the spots where my tonsils used to be.
Um, you were throwing up the shocker symbol in front of all of the wedding guests during the best man's speech. No wonder the groom thinks we're bad
You handed J your Mayan-pocalypse shopping list and told him he wasn't getting laid unless he brought everything on it. Where is he supposed to get a live goat?!
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
I'm drunk. And I'm alone. Eating chicken fingers in my underwear. I'd say life is grand.
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
FIVE TIMES AND I HAVENT GOTTEN OFF ONCE
literally yelled NOOOO right before he finished .. yelled “five times and I still haven’t gotten off” when he was still inside me ..
Said “don’t worry I’ll get myself off tomorrow” to top it all off
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