belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
I woke up on my floor...
I woke up with colors of the wind playing on repeat on my laptop...
I just woke up to crumpled tissues everywhere. Looks like it was another night filled with tears and semen.
i wish i could just chop off my fat with a knife..i would rather endure that than work out
a dead guy is trying to sell me oxy clean on my tv
It was your ex but it was not eighties night, it was pudding wrestling. And either thank you or I'm sorry depending on the state of my pants left on the doorstep
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
We fucked while The Odyssey played in the background. Homer would be proud.
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
I found my wallet. Still have no idea when I put mad dog in my steel water bottle, though...
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
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