pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
You can't just leave with hair like that
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
Not gonna make it. My ovaries are playing laser tag
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
Is it weird that my ex and the dude I'm talking to now both only have one testicle? Apparently I've found my type..
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
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