At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
I saw Winona at my church today. She has boobs, now.
Miracles do happen.
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
Shitty. Well if it makes you feel any better I just had a toothless wasted crackhead in my bar who was mad because there are TOO MANY FUCKIN TREES in Nantucket.
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
Randomize
