just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
You smell like stripper and shame
Must be January. Theres a fat chick on an elliptical wearing khaki capris. Someone doesnt own any workout clothes
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
also dude totally apologize for the whole drunken "want something in my mouth" text
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
Hey buddy, turns out those were the PB&shroomwiches, soooo you may want to reconsider dinner with your girlfriends family tonight...
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
Randomize
