so i woke up this morning thinking _____ was in bed with me. . .but it was only a half eaten sonic burger
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
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